waiting

I have not posted in a very long time and i'll tell you why. I relocated my blog because someone i was uncomfortable with was reading it. a lot. shortly after i relocated it i realized that there was a very good chance that they had found it again. so for now i guess i am going to take a leap of faith and try to just do what i enjoy and not worry about the rest.

i finished work one week ago today. the baby was due monday or tuesday - depending on who you talk to). the little guy seems pretty intent on staying put.

so we sit and wait. we have midwife appointments just about every day now. there is a little progress made every day but it's funny. i got so frustrated a few weeks ago wanting this to be over that i am actually being very patient now. and i'm glad of it. i can't imagine what torture it must be waiting. okay, i can. and i'm glad that for now i am okay to wait for him to decide when he is ready. don't get me wrong i really hope that he decides soon. for everone's sake. mine and danny's (who is going to bust if it doesn't happen soon) and Danna's (who flew out here to meet her nephew) and jen (who is flying in on saturday to hopefully meet her first grandson!) i know we would have a nice visit either way but i really hope they get to see him before they go!

quick update

i am still fighting with the evil home depot. but i think they're sufficiently tired of hearing from me and are really ready to make sure our counter installation is a success. we'll see.

the cottage was amazing and totally wonderful. one week of lounging and reading and hanging out with friends and family on the beach. wonderful!

home depot must die

i can't write much, because i think it might be 600 degrees upstairs in our house and i'm pretty sure thats not healthy.

but today i had a moment of anger. i have been soooo excited about putting new flooring and a countertop in our kitchen. (i love you mom, but that purple is uuugly.) we got some money from the taxman (yeah for the taxman!) and decided to go ahead with it. we went to home depot last week and they quoted a price. it was decent so we went ahead with having everything measured and an official quote done up and it came in at twice what they said it would.

i was tres, tres unhappy. (still am, come to think of it.) a lot of the stuff the first lady said was included is, indeed, not included. which isn't a big deal because we can do it ourselves or ask someone for help. and removing those things from the quote does take a good chunk off the price (not as much as it should, but still a lot). but, seriously, how do you screw it up THAT badly?

tim offered to boycott "the depot" and i appreciate the sentiment. but i'm pretty sure he didn't really mean it. he holds a deep love for building materials that goes beyond brotherly love.

dilemma

it has been a while since i posted and i'll tell you why. i've been pondering.

i like to have the blog. i have friends all over the country now, from one side to the other. and i like that they can get a real glimpse of my life from time to time. but as of late (and don't ask me how i know this, because i wish i didn't) my blog has gotten a lot of attention from someone who i don't want having that look into my life. a really lot of attention. more attention than people who know me and like me (i know there are many!)

i didn't want to stop writing, because (as i've already said) i like doing it. but i also felt creeped out whenever i sat down to type. like i couldn't be myself knowing that there's someone out there intruding. on the other hand, i'm not unrealistic. i know this is cyberspace. and you have to let it go into the world and be free of it. but this was too much over a line for me. so i've relocated. same blog. same everything, just new address.

please bear with me. we'll see how it goes.

camera happy

gone, baby, gone

so danna departed our company on thursday. it was sad to see her go but we had a very nice visit while she was here and it was good to spend a couple of days alone with danny. i seriously don't remember the last time i had time off work when i wasn't flying half way across the country to visit family or see the world. it was very nice and relaxing. i don't know if it was that or just time, but i'm feeling a bit better physically as well. for now the migraines have died down a bit and i've got a bit more energy. i'm trying to enjoy it while it lasts and hope its for a while.

paula lookin sexy


grandma holding baby grace


goofy danny...


cobb camping 2008


first lawn mowing at the new house


hangin out


danna about to head home

rollin with my homies

we have company and its been really nice. danny's sister danna is in town for two weeks and is staying with us. we're planning on some camping this weekend and danny and i both have next week off! i am soooooo looking forward to it. actually, danny's holidays start tomorrow. i think him and danna are going to drive down to niagra falls for the day while i'm at work slaving away. i just hope the weather it as it says its going to be - nice. if not we could freeze our little (not so little) butts right off.

the beat goes on

we are slowly getting the house rearranged. it's good but a lot of work. and seeing as i seem to fall asleep at the drop of a hat these days (except at night!) - i'm afraid danny is still doing more than his fair share. but he's being really amazing and trying not to complain even when the hormones seize control of me and i get a wee bit (read: a lot) cranky. thank god he loves me because i swear to god i have a hair trigger. i could be laughing, i could be crying or i could be informing him he is 'doing it wrong' at any given moment.

we had another appointment with the midwife this week. she seemed to think things looked fine, which is obviously good news. though she didn't seem to approve of the fact that we have a dopler at home. apparently we are not properly trained to use it, which of course we already know. but it doesn't exactly take a rocket scientist. just point and shoot, so to speak. good thing we don't really care what she thinks . other than that i actually really liked her. when she took my blood she actually got me in one poke, there was no digging around and only a very small bruise.

heartbeat

so we heard the baby's heartbeat this week. it was very cool. its funny, because in a way i don't really 'feel' pregnant. i mean i feel like crap all right. but other than that it doesn't seem real. but there inside me is this little heart beating so strongly. its so surreal and amazing.

i've been out today enjoying the amazing weather we are having. i want to suck it all in. and i just had to look up whitehorse - it is 0 there today. Here the flowers are coming up! i love it. i even got a bit of sun today. (sitting in my own backyard!) god it has been an amazing year.

more progress

even though he had a very bad start to his work day yesterday, danny was still able to get home a couple of hours early and we got rid of more crap! we took a whole load to value village (we tried to go to the salvation army - but the whole building was gone!)

we got a lot done this weekend and it feels really good. danny even got out and raked all the old dead leaves off of out front lawn. and someone must have cleaned up the giant pile of dog crap that we found on our front lawn when things started to thaw - because i'm pretty sure it was gone (thank god becasue it was frigging gross).

now i just want to do some cleaning around the house and it will feel a lot better in here.

hide the cucumber

so i had a mini breakdown this week. i'm sorry to anyone who got stuck with me that day (paula, danny, lisa... the list goes on)

i decided to make myself a nice healthy salad for lunch to take to work on friday. when it came time to put the veggies away, the cucumber was missing. it was downhill from there. no one thought it was as big a deal as i did that there was a half a cucumber rotting away somewhere in my house, but i felt like i was losing my mind (my mother has since informed me that it is probably the case - she claims she was fine before she had kids!)

i mean, how do you lose a frigging cucumber? (this was repeated many times on friday, followed by hysterical laughing or crying or sometimes both.)

i did eventually find it (thank god) under the couch in the living room. i felt victorious and danny thought i was nuts (which apparently i am.)

yesterday we did some much needed purging in the house. mom came over and we cleaned out the basement. after a bit of drama we filled my brothers trailer til it was overflowing. it makes me happy to look at. we've had crap in the driveway, ont the front porch and in the basement all winter, leftover from my mom's 'shotgun move'.

so how we need to take a load to the sally ann or value village and things will feel a lot better in the house. if i can sucker someone into helping me, i'm going to try to get it done today. yesterday mom helped us moved some stuff upstairs into what will be the baby's room and with the rest of the crap gone we'll be able to move some of the other baby things downstairs and we'll get our dining room back!

chaos

the house is in a state of total chaos right now. the amazing people in my life keep donating baby stuff to us so our house is in a state of perpetual sorting and relocating.

what really needs to be done the most are the spare room upstairs and the basement. so that we would actually have somewhere to store this stuff instead of having it scattered all through our living area - but we're doing what we can. i'm so tired that i haven't been up to much and danny has been amazing helping to take over some of my share of the work around here. thank god or we'd be in real trouble.

the last couple of days have been a strange glimpse into the future though. last night i found myself washing a load of baby things and we have tiny little shoes strewn across the living room. i can already picture myself harassing some little person to put them away. which just seems too strange.

the second wiper bites the dust

my other windshield wiper went to the big crap-hole in the sky this week. i can hardly wait to throw it in the garbage. but i have to get to the Canadian Tire first, hopefully tomorrow. at least it is on the passenger side this time.

on a positive note - paula pulled the good wiper right off the car today. she claims it was an accident and it slid right off - but i know that saucy little minx is really full of evil (i love you)!

work was long today. my boss is away again and of course that means the crazies came out of the woodwork. a man talked to me today like (i dont think) any person has ever spoken to me. and not in a good way. he was a bad man. a very bad man. and i waas calling to do him a favour. so now i kind of hope we DO have to lien him after all. although he told me quite clearly he really didn't give a crap if we did.

danny is making me clean...

...on my day off. and so i am updating my blog. lets call it 'cleaning up loose ends' or 'cleaning up the internet' although that probably doesn't hold much water given the recent R rating.


today i had a very productive day. i finally replaced my shitty-ass windshield wiper that has been crappy since i bought it a year ago. it finally passed the line into 'piece of shit' this week when the whole blade peeled off. it was time to take action and, naturally, i put it off a week and have been driving around like that. but it was getting to the point that i couldn't see out of the driver's side any more so i broke down.

while i was there i optimistically went through their seed selection and picked out some flowers i would like to plant in the spring. wish me luck!

jill sucks

i recently discovered an amaging thing (thank you jill! - i totally bitch-slapped your ass... he he)
Apparently my blog is rated R..



This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
* crap (4x) * hurt (3x) * bitch (2x) * poop (1x)


This totally kills me.

To find out what your blog is rated, go to http://www.justsayhi.com/bb/blog_rating

waiting

my right foot is numb.
it may not seem like a serious matter, but it is going to hurt like a biatch when i try to stand up.
i am screwing around waiting for an old friend to pick me up for coffee. or tea more like, because coffee will have me buzzing into the wee hours.
i haven't seen this girl in probably 8 years. just before i left for the yukon.
shit.
now my left foot is numb.

lots of big news

so. i have a new baby niece, Grace. she is very cute. and an angel, just like her sister, i'm sure (i kid. but i've been told not to tell Em that she is bad - but that she does bad things.) i wish i had the camera handy and i would post the pictures taken yesterday. one of Em with her finger up her nose and a shit-eating grin on her face and the others of her jumping on my bed. very nice.

for the past two days we have been painting the house. some of it looks great and some of it is pink. i tried to convnice danny of that before we bought it but i dont think he believed me. now we have pink walls and he believes me. too little too late. i'm probably going to wake up one morning and crack and kill the whole family (ie. danny and the cat) and i'm going to blame it on pink walls.

speaking of the cat - i think we've decided to start locking him in the basement at night. which does not sound very nice, but if anyone knew my cat i think they would understand. we put him down ther two nights ago because i got tired of wiping paint off of him. but i've been getting better sleep than i have in years. and we dont have heat in our room so with the cat in the basement we can leave the door to the room open and it doesn't dip to near freezing temperatures in there at night.

signing off
i'm 'crazy' for pink

K

these are for jennifer...